"your vision will become clear
when you look into your own heart.
who looks outside, dreams;
who looks inside,
I am looking inside.
I am awakening.
This is my story.
The journey is a simple one.
The journey is to just BE.
Unfortunately there are roads blocks.
Good and bad.
Good makes a person content.
Bad makes us work harder.
This past april, I had an “episode” of anxiety, panic.
Where I didn't feel I could breathe.
Which lead to panic and anxiety when trying to go to sleep.
Sleep did not happen, pacing did.
After about a week, I went to a walk in clinic.
"Everything seems okay, here is a fast acting inhaler."
Okay good. But just a band-aid.
But enough of one so I slept a little better that night.
Another week goes by.
It continues, anxiety and pacing at night.
I am breathing, I know that i'm breathing.
But I can't catch my breath.
After sitting out, all day in the fresh air, watching my son play baseball.
I keep trying to breathe, catch my breath, get my lungs full to the top.
In the open, vast sky. I couldn't “breathe.”
I had my husband take me to the ER.
My blood pressure, because I had myself so worked up...was 151/101.
All sorts of test run, chest xray etc, etc.
My test are a normal.
My BP is back to within normal limits.
"Here are two ativan."
To help “calm me” so I can sleep.
“get a stress test done.”
I had been keeping track of my BP.
I had some spikes but basically within normal limits.
I go to see a Dr. for the stress test referral.
I explain to the nurse what I've been experiencing. She totally understands.
I see the Dr. I explain what I've been experiencing.
He doesn't feel I need a stress test.
“Just breathe into your hands.” “You are hyperventilating.”
I had been taking an “anxiety” pill at night, which I got from my mom, so I could sleep.
I continued to do that until I could get into my gynecologist whom I usually see for
I explain my difficulties to him.
He is not happy that I am taking the pills from my mom.
All said and done. My diagnosis is Hashimoto.
And a script for an anti-depressant.
10 mg. Most people take 7.5 mg
What did the anti-depressant do for me? What made me not want to get out of bed in the morning. My anti-depressant was making me depressed.
(this is just my experience...hopefully it is working for you.)
So, I weaned myself off of it.
I occasionally have night's of panic, like claustrophobia.
But I can talk myself out of it.
“you are breathing.”
and I am out of it.
And I fall asleep.
Find out why we get lumped into categories.
Why do we just put band-aids on the problem.
“Here's a pill.”
Take charge of me.
“Look outside, dream.”
“Look inside, AWAKEN.”
Wake up call. If not now, when?
I've been taking care of me.
Why has the gorgeous head of hair I had until my mid 30 left me?
Thyroid? Maybe. Good possibility.
Coloring the gray? Maybe.
So...I stopped coloring.
I'm 52. I am embracing the gray.
I've been taking ItWorks products for a year.
It's working. What I've been doing is working.
my hair is coming back.
slowly, little gray spikes...but working.
I just signed on as a distributor. So I can reap the benefits.
My journey is ever evolving.
What about you?
welcome to coffee hour.
welcome to this Sunday morning.